Finally a warm spring day
Don’t wanna go in
Sunshine wraps you like a freshly cleaned blanket
Don’t wanna go in
Gentle breeze whispers in your ear
Don’t wanna go in
Grills waking up from a long winter nap
Don’t wanna go in
Joyous chatter of neighborhood kids
Don’t wanna go in
Bikes racing, balls rolling, sidewalk chalk scratching
Don’t wanna go in
Making up games, changing the rules
Don’t wanna go in
Past Audrey’s bedtime
Don’t wanna go in
Cherish every minute
Don’t wanna go in
Sun slipping away
Don’t wanna go in
Something about that first warm day
…Don’t wanna go in
College days spent together
Then separate ways
Cities, careers, families
Once a year
Come together
Eat, sleep, drink
Reconnect, reminisce… laugh
Words can
heal
hurt
soothe
destroy
calm
be misunderstood
unite
tear apart
be just what you need
be unnecessary
teach
be used as a weapon
forgive
be not enough
celebrate
overwhelm
express
be withheld
be meticulously chosen
be carelessly thrown out
How will you use words today?
Some are there because they have no parents. Some are there because they were living in horrible circumstances that children should never experience. Some are there because their parents can not afford to provide the basic necessities of life. Some had been there all their life. Some remember what life was like outside those gates.
We were fortunate enough to be invited into their world, an exclusive invitation only sent out twice a year, for a one week duration. We accepted, not knowing what to expect. We accepted thinking we were the ones helping out. We accepted believing we were going to teach them. We accepted assuming the language barrier would impede the the learning.
They were waiting for us when we arrived. They welcomed us into their home. They took us on a tour of the school, living areas, dining hall, kitchen, clinic, and farm. They showed us how a few adults can create a loving family with almost 700 children. They demonstrated how they were almost entirely self-sufficient with their food supply. They integrated us into their daily life like we were family.
They opened our eyes to the fact that you don’t need to speak the same language to understand. They showed us that family is who you welcome into your heart. They showed us there is hope in places you might not expect. They showed us how to work together toward a common goal. They showed us you can have nothing, yet have everything.
They made a permanent imprint on my heart. I am forever grateful to that orphanage in Mexico that extended a simple invitation.
How much and what kind of responsibilities should kids have at home as they grow up? This is something that I struggle with as a parent. I want to find the perfect balance for Audrey, at every age, that she is learning to be responsible and allowing her to be a kid at the same time.
I struggle with giving her chores. First of all, I don’t like the word chores. Chores, to me, has such a negative connotation. I like to think of it as how people live- we don’t leave our things all over the floor, we put dirty dishes in the dishwasher, we put dirty clothes in the laundry so they are ready to be washed. It’s not a chore, its how you live.
I struggle with making the bed. Should she have to do it every day? I don’t make my bed every day. Some mornings are busy and I’m happy to get her out of the house dressed with her teeth brushed. Some days we will not see the bed again until bedtime.
I struggle with toys being picked up. She is pretty good about picking up after herself. But every time- no. Some evenings I pick up her toys. Should I be more strict? I don’t know.
I think one of the reasons I don’t feel I need to be more strict is because she offers to help with other things. When I do dishes, she volunteers to help wash or dry. She’ll grab a rag to dust when I dust. She is the one that usually notices the dog nose prints on the windows and wants to wash them. This evening when I told her I was going to get dinner ready after I finished the laundry, I came down to find she made the table “fancy” for dinner. She pulled out the table cloth and place mats (that we never use), put everything in place, and even made us name tags for out places.
I feel like I am raising a responsible 5 year old and allowing her to be a kid at the same time. But why am I always questioning myself?
Up, Up, Up
Down
Down
Down
I work so hard to try and please
But never get it right
Down
Down
Down
Up, Up, Up
Pick one and leave me alone
Just make up your mind!
Like all kids, Audrey likes feeling like a big kid. So when we saw the local hospital had a class for kids about to become big brothers or sisters, we signed her up. “Daddy gets to go to class, and so do I.”
The day finally came and she was so excited- it was her big day to go to class. We picked out her favorite doll and headed off to this very important adventure to learn all about being a big sister.
When we first arrived Audrey barely said her name loud enough for the teacher, who was right next to her, to hear it.
When all the children took turns sharing if they were having a brother or sister, she gained some confidence, and loud enough for everyone to hear declared, “It is a surprise!”
When the teacher asked what do babies need, Audrey proudly shouted out “diapers.”
Then is was time to practice changing the diaper. All the kids took their doll, gathered in a circle on the floor with the teacher while the adults remained in their seats. The teacher was demonstrating how to change the diaper and the kids were practicing.
Suddenly there was a voice. It was loud. It was bold. It was confident. It was very familiar. It rose above ALL the other voices in the room.
“One time” Oh, no. Where is this going? This is a scary way to start a story. Why did the room get silent?
“When my Mommy and Daddy were gone” No! No! What story is this? Have I heard it?
“And I was at my Auntie Dawn’s house” When was this? Is this recent? What happened? Why aren’t you all talking? Resume your conversations! Did it suddenly get hot in here?
“And I was helping to change baby Cayden’s diaper” No. Please. Please. Please be an appropriate story, please! Why doesn’t any other child have something to say?
“It was really, really smelly!” Ok relax, breathe. Potential disaster avoided.
“Yes, my favorite pants….Oh, a little (ok- a lot) snug.” Back of the closet.
“Ok, let’s try these….not quite yet. Maybe in a few weeks.” Back of the closet.
“These have to work….great! They will, I’m sure they will stretch a little as I wear them.”
Now for a shirt.” Oohh, this one is so comfy….Oh look, there’s my belly.” Back of the closet.
“Maybe this one fits now….Nope, still too big.” Back of the closet.
“This one’s has got to be it….well, what if I put a tank top underneath…yes, this will do for today, but probably the last time.”
Tomorrow the adventure begins again…
You can wake up, run a comb through your hair and go on with your day.
You can spend an hour every day putting each hair exactly where you want it.
You are beautiful!
You can apply make-up every day.
You can walk by the beauty section of the store without a glance.
You are beautiful!
You can wear hand-me-down clothes until they are thread-bare.
You can buy expensive designer clothes.
You are beautiful!
You can exercise for hours a day.
You can never see the inside of a gym.
You are beautiful!
People can tell you that you are absolutely gorgeous.
People can make jokes at your expense.
You are beautiful!
You are beautiful!
I wrote this piece to give to my daughter when she is going through that very tough adolescent phase of life.
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